Grace-period

I was a bit frustrated in the last post. Who wouldn't be? The world is full of struggles that God just seems to allow. ISIS, Ferguson, friends dying, people lacking simple things like food, housing, relationships. What I realized yesterday, as I walked to buy a spice cake to make for my sister, as each step sent me to Jesus in prayer,  is that he has been with me, every step.  With a fast paced life and a quicker mind that just races through ideas, I am often trying to be better, to improve, to be good. For instance,  I want to incorporate spiritual disciplines. Quiet time daily turns into a snooze alarm. Gathering for worship is boring sometimes, and I am easily distracted. Prayer time is fleeting moments in the car. Reading my Bible consists mostly of preparation for teaching or refuting a claim in a sermon. Sabbath is difficult because when I rest, I sleep. Fasting is less about God than maybe dropping a little weight as a pay off. My pain sucks, I won't lie or down pl...

I have told many women over the years that sometimes God is the only one who can make things right and that, rather than call out to him as a last resort, perhaps we should start with him. Sometimes it is easier to share things like that than practice them for me. I have been in pain for weeks.  I know that my arthritis has inflamed my spinal nerves which has caused the pains that shoot down my legs.  I have struggled with this off and on for years.  But this time fear has begun to crept into my mind.  What if the pain doesn't go away?  What if I end up needing narcotic pain medication all the time?  With each step my body struggles to take, each pose it attempts to make, my spirit flies to Jesus for refuge from my searing lumbar spine.  But I do not ask for healing.  I used to.  I used to believe that it might be possible.  That it was my responsibility to ask.  I just don't know anymore.  The other night my dogs got out of...