Showing posts from May, 2012


Today was a very sad day, but it seemed like a very ordinary day.  Until.  It is those untils that are the moments when your heart skips a beat and your breath catches.  When the world you see looks the same as it did 5 minutes before the until, but your mind can't make sense of that fact when you know that nothing is ever going to be the same again.

Armchair QB

“The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field. “Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it.
Matthew 13:44-46 NIV
It is never good when the preacher says something like this: "Don't expect the guy up here [speaking] to give you all the answers because he doesn't know everything," or "What did Jesus mean here?  I don't know."  I mean, really?  Don't you have a doctorate in something religious? 
It is pretty unsettling that the dude in charge admits he doesn't know.  This guy isn't that dumb, either.  I have edited his papers.  I can identify dumb.  So if he doesn't know what Jesus is talking about, how am I supposed to?  I am in the medical profession.  I can tell you how a heart works or even deliver a baby.  E…

All Consuming Fire

We were camping this week with some good friends.  One of the favorite parts of any one's camping excursion has to be having a campfire.  Around it we sing songs, tell stories, remember, & roast marshmallows, much like our ancestors.  Ok, they might've roasted meat instead, but it is a very primal thing to gather around fire.
To watch a beautiful tepee fire burn can be mesmerizing, the flames dancing as waves in the air with the foam of embers crashing in the sky, as you wait impatiently for the hot coals that can toast a perfect marshmallow.
While I have probably read about too many saints, and thought too much about God, I wonder if we are to be like those logs that give off the exquisite fire.  I know.  Here she goes.  Yep.
By myself, I am just wood on the forest floor.  Useless.  Beautiful scenery, but I am useless.  I will rot.  I may become food for insects.  I may become dirt. But the fullness of who I am, the beauty of it, may be left untouched.
Gathered with others, l…


"How does it feel to hug someone who is really safe?" ~Jeff Probst of Survivor

I was watching Survivor this week, and it was the episode when they compete to have family visits.  It is always both intriguing and awkward to see the contestants vulnerability come through as they see their loved one.  The only time I don't remember any vulnerability was that weird older guy who hung out in his dark pink briefs and who was supposedly an FBI agent.  He was either so crazy, or so into the game, that he never broke character.

But the other night, it was sad, to see how much a million dollars is worth.  I get the game-outwit, outplay, outlast.  I watch out of curiosity, for moments such as those when the masks are shattered and, for just a moment, a daughter hugs her daddy and Jeff asks, "How does it feel to hug someone who is really safe?"


Yesterday I received an email from a friend asking about the church.  She and I have had many conversations about her journe…