Promise of Resurrection

Die to self.

That is easier said than done, but it is also the beginning. I know that I cannot fix me...

Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Psalm 51:10

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Psalm 139:23,24

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5,6

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matt 11:28

Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. Matt 10:39

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 2 Cor 5:17

Well, you get the idea. I die to the fact that I am able to do any of this. Even as a child of God, I rely on God more, not less, to grow and become more like Jesus. God can see the deepest places of my heart which I can too easily hide from myself. I trust Him to search out every thing that might offend Him and come between us. I ask Him to make me a new passions. He shows me which way to go. I rely on His wisdom, not mine. I rest in His sovereignty, not my will. I give up what I would make myself into, for that which my Father makes me.

And, as annoyed as I can get with myself, it is not really my job to critique God's work. Frankly, I made a mess of my life and my spirit trying to do it my way. Altho I have had some relief early, my first reflex is not always His and I need to intentionally refocus on Him and His work. I am God's work in progress, and for today that is ok. It was His Spirit that called me, soothed me, embraced me...why do I know figure I should be doing everything right? (Think Paul said this somewhere.) Certainly, I would not choose to continue to sin, but today I can text my prayer/accountability/encouragement partner, which I do, and memorize some verses to train my mind to focus on His things for me, which slips my mind easily.

Sometimes I think I should be grown tho the exact nature of this is that it gives me a false sense of pride and control, when what I really need is to be resting in Dad's work on me. I know anything He does is good. I know He has plans to mold me into an exceptional woman who gives all props to Him.

Help me in my unbelief!


Benjamin Kreps said…
Hey J,

I read this earlier this morning and it warmed my heart and then my next thought was to encourage you with it as well. It's a quote from J.I Packer "Knowing God"

"Grace is God drawing us sinners closer and closer to himself. How does God in grace prosecute this purpose? Not by shielding us from assault by the world, the flesh and the devil, nor by protecting us from burdensome and frustrating circumstances, nor yet by shielding from troubles created by our own temperament and psychology; but rather by exposing us to all these things, so as to overwhelm us with a sense of our own inadequacy, and drive us to cling to him more closely. This is the ultimate reason, from our standpoint, why God fills our lives with troubles and perplexities of one sort and another: it is to ensure that we shall learn to hold him fast. The reason why the Bible spends so much of its time reiterating that God is a strong rock, a firm defense, and a sure refuge and help for the weak, is that God spends so much of his time bringing home to us that we are weak, both mentally and morally, and dare not trust ourselves to find, or to follow, the right road...therefore he takes steps to drive us out of self-confidence to tr trust in himself-in the classical scriptural phrase for the secret of the godly life, to 'wait on the Lord' "

Your brother in Christ
-Ben Kreps
Anonymous said…
I always listen to my God music on the way to work and today I heard a beautiful song about letting go our desires for our life. Can't remember the name or singer. God's desires may or may not be ours. He uses are passions and our gifts and directs us down the path. But only if we stop and listen and not to our ego, our pride and in humility. The humility part is what i keep forgetting and when i forgot God usually reminds me by NOT babying me and fixing all my messes. So with scrapped knees and in humility i ask him for his guidence and help. No longer that little girl that is pulling away saying "me do".
Thanks you both for sharing i appreciate having a place to type out my thoughts. To seek guidence and wisdom from my brothers and sisters in Christ.

Sinner still "yes" a work in progress "yes" Ok with that today "yes". Is God ok with it "yes" but he is going to let me know when he isn't "I accept that today, acknowledge it, appreciate it always if not today then, down the road"

In Him
Jaime said…
One of my deepest joys lately has been traveling in community. To know that, not only is God with me, but so are my brothers and sisters who have hearts that desire Him, as I do, and who still screw up often, as I do. We encourage each other by practicing humility, being real, with each other as we continue to walk in God's ways.
Anonymous said…
Me too Jaime because in being that perfectionist type A person that i am. I have tried like crazy in the past to walk that Christ like path perfectly. I couldn't do it and ended up spending more time beating up on myself than letting God love me. It made me want to run like Hell from Christ. That critical inner parent was in control not Christ who is loving, forgiving and accepts and loves us unconditionally.
I can't fix me!!!!
God can!!!
I think i will let him!!
He is much nicer than me!!!


thanks for the study break. God has me on a path that is CHALLENGING my ability to STUDY again. yikes. Lord i really need help!! focus..focus..focus...

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