There seems to be a lot of darkness around. I wish it were easy to just trust that things will turn out ok. I know that "ok" does not mean "easy" or "right" or "good" as we often perceive. My definition of "ok" is that God will handle it for the best. But what if he is busy? Are all these little things of mine important? And what about the big things, the death, the illness, the losses around me-what is he doing about that? There just doesn't seem to be much peace.
Sometimes I can get stuck there, in the immediate pain, the emotional confusion. It offends me. It feels so wrong. And maybe it is, but it is also our reality.
Things are broken here. We weren't made for this disconnect. We were made to be able to run to Dad, to find such comfort that there is no need for consolation. The sorrow and grief and brokenness of our reality should feel wrong to me. Thank God it does! Because I know there is more; this is not the whole enchilada.
There is more. I don't know what all there is, but I know Dad is near, and I look forward to running into his arms. For now, I will huddle with friends and family for meager warmth, frail hope and clumsy connections.
"And if I go and prepare a place for you,
I will come back and take you to be with me
that you also may be where I am," said Jesus (John 14:3)
"And it will be cool to see you there.
Where you won't sin on me and I won't sin on you.
And you can get rid of the cane and the toupee,"
exclaimed Kirk (4/26/2009)