For I am persuaded,
that neither death, nor life, nor angels,
nor principalities, nor powers,
nor things present, nor things to come,
nor height, nor depth,
nor any other creature,
shall be able to separate us from the love of God.
Romans 8:38-39 KJV
We have a friend who sings this verse in one breath around the campfire. It makes me giggle every time, probably because it makes all the kids giggle at a silly time of the night and probably because it is such an odd talent to have. But it is also a humbling verse to think about.
Do I really believe what this verse says? What are the things I have believed can cause God to turn on me? If this is true, where is God when I feel so alone?
Sometimes my brain can't wrap itself around the message even while my heart longs to swim in the grace that flows in this verse.
Nothing, like literally nothing, that I can know of or only can imagine or haven't even heard of, can take me away from Him. Not the pain in my heart of watching others suffer, the decay of my body, the struggle with pride and fear, the comfort of this life, the struggles of this life, wars and instability, my negative self talk, abuse that still haunts....nothing!
Paul writes that he is "persuaded" or convinced of this fact. Am I?
I haven't been. Somewhere there is still this thought that although God is good, if I am not good, well, He might not want me. I would be a let down. I smirk as I write those words because nothing has been hidden between Him and I. It isn't like a blind date or that show "Who the Bleep Did I Marry?" He knew me long before I knew Him. He loved me long before I could love. He wanted me before I wanted Him, with all my bruises and scars, He wanted me.
So, I haven't been convinced, but I am willing to be. I want to be! I want to be so sure of His love that there is no hesitation. That instead of pulling back from Him when I stumble, I run to Him-the only refuge I have ever known.
This may be my meditation for a while. I am still gnawing on the verse, absorbing it slowly. It is a mouthful, even if you can sing it in one breath.