Armchair QB

God has a sense of humor, doesn't He?

This Sunday my husband and I visited a different church, Inner Metro Green. Sounds a little like a golfcourse in the ghetto, but it is actually a missional church plant in Lancaster city. I researched them to see what they believed, how the messages were, what music style. Even so, I have this anxiety about not knowing which door to enter. Makes me not like to try new things. (Pride sucks) So I had to laugh when we got near the church->seemed like EVERY door was open.

The service was very much as I expected, having looked into it pretty thoroughly, but what I didn't expect was communion. What surprised me about this was that every church my husband and I have visited has been celebrating communion on that Sunday, even those that only celebrate monthly. Almost this heavenly embrace to reassure us, "This is My body. You are My body."

And, of course, the message, was "right on time" as well. Text is Genesis 12.

The official title was, "How Can We Become Channels of Blessings" but Shawn (pastor) noted that a more appropriate focus might be understanding how to receive blessing so that we can bless others. "A glass can only spill what it contains," tho it was his first point, could easily have been the working title.

If you know my story, you know I have been thru some challenging life circumstances and at times struggle still with how to manage the aftermath. Most of us have baggage, from stuff we can stow under our seats to suitcases of junk we pay extra to just take with us. God wants to redeem His creation, and we can agree to this in obscure eternal life terms sometimes, but did you know He wants to redeem our tragedies, our wounds, our scars?

We want to fix ourselves, as evidenced by the self help section of any bookstore as well as the myriad of self help groups. We want to be better. We want a makeover...just flick thru the TV. Check out the infomercials. We don't want to be who we are. But what if who we are is exactly who God intended us?

Look, I know life sucks sometimes. I am not suggesting that death or illness or abuse is "good." What I am saying is that good can come from it when we can be honest about who we are, where we were, and where God is leading us. We can give light to the dark path that others are walking. We can give hope. We can love. We can embrace. We can walk beside.

God called Abram out of the land of his family, away from friends, family, work, gods, his history. Abram didn't even know God, really; His family worshipped idols. But Abram was willing to obey, to follow some direction and see where God might be leading. Wonder if he argued with God...

"But I am set here. Everything is good here. How come you can't just do Your thing here?"

or

"Why do I need to leave my friends?"

or
"Are You SURE?! I think over there would be good. How about we stop there?"

That would be me. I would really like for God to ask my opinion before he turns my life upside down. Like the changes going on right now. If He would've just asked me, I would've suggested other ideas that probably would've worked better.

HUH?!?!

Ok, well, it is just hard sometimes to just be. I want to fix, smooth, lead, land...

Apparently God wants me to follow Him rather than lead Him. Which, isn't such a bad deal really. When I think back on some of my prayers and desires over the years, I am glad that He doesn't give me everything I want. And even today He keeps affirming to me that He is ahead, lovingly guiding me thru silly things like open doors and the Eucharist.

Just as it wasn't all about Abram, every people of the earth were to be blessed thru him, I don't think my life is just about me, either. Being able to give back, to lovingly guide others thru their trials, is a blessing...for both if us.

So as I fret and feel all the storm of emotions when changes come my way that seem to uproot all that I love, I will re-read this...as not only evidence of Dad's love, but also of evidence of His goodness that we often cannot see.

And then I will walk....