What holds us together?

I am not the tape to piece your life together. I am not the super glue to seal the cracks of breakage in your world. I wish I could. I wish I could fix you. I wish you could see what I see in you. I wish you could stand in my shoes and get a different perspective. It saddens me to know that you can't. I know that right now you're trapped-in the pain and the chaos in your head, believing the lies, hoping to die, wishing that it would all simply stop.

Frankly I'm not even the superglue for my own life. I can also be a mess, overwhelmed and insecure. I have brokenness that you might not see, but it is there. I've been thinking about that tonight, as I wonder-what is my superglue?

During this time of year when the darkness comes too early and, worse, the darkness inside my head seems to creep a little closer, I have only one superglue, one refuge, one hope.

Jesus. I think that's why we celebrate his birth during these dark nights, not because of some Roman god. The thought that God left a perfect place and came to live amongst us, an imperfect and messy people, a people who truly live in darkened both literal and not so much. The idea of Emanuel. That if we would just allow, that God will be with us, dwell with us, hold us, heal us.

My heart has been heavy, bearing your brokenness & need, as well as my own, to our Father, but I can't make you whole any more than I can fix myself. But he can. 

 

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